Where have these 8 weeks gone?!?

Our DD came home 8 weeks ago! I can not believe how fast the time has gone! She is 15 months today! These last 8 weeks have been amazing and exhausting! M is a lovely girl who loves to smile, giggle and please. She learnt to walk last week and there is no stopping her now! I love being a mum! It is all I have every dreamed of! I have been so happy since having M. It has been very hard work and such a sudden dramatic change in lifestyle. I miss the time that I used to spend with my DH, just the two of us. That said, I love spending time as a family, the three of us now!

We met our daughter today!

Today has been amazing! We met M and she is adorable! She recognised us from the photos she was given last week. Amazing for a 1 year old! She kept looking at the pictures and then us and then smiling! She warmed to us very quickly. She is a very happy calm girl that loves to babble, dance and sing! Can't wait to see her again tomorrow. Hopefully she will be home forever on 25th April! So happy and excited! All is very surreal at the moment!

I will be a mummy this month!!

Only 2 weeks until we meet our daughter! Only 3 weeks until we hopefully bring our daughter home!! There are only a couple of things that we need to do before we meet her. First is our Matching panel on the 10th April - 10 people will interview us again to agree that we can adopt her. After that we have the introduction period which I am feeling very nervous about!! Anyone in the UK got any advice for introductions? M is 1 year old and not sure what to expect when it comes to introductions! I have waited so long for this and now that it is so close I am getting extremely excited/nervous/impatient! It was Mothers day over here in the UK last weekend. Another Mothers day where I do not have a child. I managed to keep myself busy by getting the nursery ready and washing clothes etc. My DH did something very sweet - he got me a 'nearly' mothers day card! He wrote how I am a 'nearly mummy' and I thought it was a lovely thing to do!

We are adopting a little girl!!

I am so happy right now! We have been matched with a little 11 month old girl who I shall call 'M'. We have met her social workers, her foster carers, read her history, seen some photographs and videos. She is beautiful! We go back to panel, where 10 people will interview us again and confirm 100% that we are allowed to adopt her. This will be on the 10th April. As long as they day yes, we will meet her on 17th April, get to know her over 10ish days and hopefully have her home by 28th April!! I can not believe I am finally going to be a mum! I have waited and wished for this for so so long and it is nearly here! We have been shopping for a buggy, car seat, high chair, decorated the nursery and I am getting so excited! I guess I am starting to nest! I do however feel extremely nervous, overwhelmed and a bit scared, but I think all are normal feelings for any new mum, whether it be due to adoption, or having a biological child. One thing I do know is that I love her already and I have yet to meet her!! Crazy! It just feels so right!

They said YES!!

Panel went well. We had 10 people interview us, but it didn't last very long. We were told they were very positive about us from our portfolio that they had read. We were only in for 10 mins. Instead of them sending us out of the room to talk about us to decide, they spoke in front of us! It was a unanimous 'yes' we should be allowed to adopt! So happy and relieved! We can be parents!

Will they say yes?

Tomorrow is when we find out if we are approved as adopters! I am so nervous and excited! Tomorrow could change our life! Frustratingly I have been ill and off work in bed for the last 2 days with a bad cold! It will not stop me turning up tomorrow for panel (interview). On other exciting news, we will also be given a CPR (profile) of a child we have been told about....! More info on that to come if we like the look of her.....! SO EXCITING!!

Less than a week!

Less than a week until we find out whether we will be approved to adopt! I am feeling so nervous and sick! I am not sleeping well either. When I do sleep I just keep dreaming of adoption, kids etc! I think this is worse than when we were doing IVF! Everyone is so confident we will be approved, but I am so worried we will not be! Not long now!

What is panel?

Turns out no one knows what panel is!! I guess it is an England thing! Panel is what happens after we have had our home study and our PAR (prospective adopters report) is written. It is like an interview. DH, myself + SW are put in front of a panel of approx 10 people made up of medical advisor, members of adoption agent, adoptive parents, other SW's etc. they have read our PAR and ask us questions about us, anything they want clarified and ask us about how we will be as adoptive parents. They then send us out the room, have a chat about us, call us back in the room and let us know if they will recommend us to be approved as adopters. Once they say yes we can start the search for our child!

We are going to panel on 13th Feb!! Updated

Our adoption had been going slowly up until a couple of months ago. We got assigned a new social worker, which was stressful at first, but she has turned out to be brilliant!! She has got everything done quickly, been lovely and we have got on with her really well. She came round two days ago with our completed PAR which is brilliant! We signed it and are ready and waiting for panel!! Panel is 13th Feb which feels so long away right now! I am sure it will come round quickly, but time feels like it is dragging! We are both so nervous about panel. Not sure what to expect or what they are going to ask us! Such a fear that they will reject us! There is no reason for them to reject us, but it is such a life changing decision they are making! **update: panel is an interview in front of 10 people that we have to do to get recommended to be approved as adopters