Off to Dublin for the weekend!

I am off for a hen weekend to Dublin! Just what I need to cheer me up. It will be good for me to get away from it all. I am going to have a few drinks, but will not go to mad. I know I should not drink as I might be pregnant, but I have not had a drink for so long and got a BFN every month. Maybe if I don't do things right, it may end in a BFP. I doubt it, but what they hey!

Will catch up with you all in a few days

Provisional date....!

I have been ringing and bugging the fertility clinic and finally, today they have said they will be giving me a date in a few days time, most prob for Monday the 10th May!! Now before you all get massively excited, it is just a consult to discuss my protocol and when my IVF cycle will happen. I am massively excited though! Looks like I may be cycling in the summer after all! This is the first thing that has made me smile in weeks!

Too little too late?

DH came back late last night. I have really missed him. We BD late last night. It was CD18. I usually ovulate between day 16-18. Could I have possibly ovulated yesterday? Could the timing still have been right? I don't know. I did not pee on any sticks this month. Whats the point? If I found out I ovulated on Friday or Saturday I would have been even more depressed. Instead I am working under the illusion that I ovulated Sunday and I still stand a chance this month!

Slowly slipping..

...deeper and deeper into a depression. I can not seem to stop myself. I know its a state of mind, I know I should be strong enough to pull myself out of this, but I can not.

Work is terrible, DH is away when I am ovulating, I am still waiting to hear about my IVF appointment and all my friends are having babies.

I could sit here and cry all evening but it will not change a thing.... I still am not pregnant, I do not have my baby and does not look like I will for a long time yet.

Its over before it began

You all know how excited I have been to be TTC this month, well its over. DH is having to work away this weekend. Work is demanding he goes away from Thursday-Sunday and guess what, I am due to ovulate on Saturday! I am sooooo pissed off. It is not DH's fault, he has no say in these things. I just feel so annoyed. I wish I didn't come off the pill this month, its is pointless. I am going to have a awful, painful period this month for no reason. I could have stayed on the pill this month.

In other news, I am STILL waiting to hear from the fertility clinic. I called them and they told me I have been granted funding from the nhs which is great. I am still waiting to be given a date though. It is so frustrating. I am so tired of waiting.

Away for the weekend

Not much been going on. My period has ended and it was the best period I have had in ages. A lot less pain which is great.

I am excited to be TTC this month. I am away at a congress for the weekend and when I get back I am due to ovulate. I look forward to getting back and having a lot of sex!

As far as IVF goes, I am still waiting for an appointment in the summer. I will call the clinic next week if I do not here anything

What a difference a month makes

I am so pleased I went back on the pill last month. I cant believe I just said that! My period this month has been a lot better. Less pain and not as heavy. I am still in shit loads of pain, but I can walk, I can function which is a lot more than I have been able to do previously.
I just hope that I ovulate this month. I am not sure what coming on and off the pill will do to my cycles. I am just pleased that my endo has calmed down a little, for how long though I dont know.

I am starting to get impatient with my IVF. I thought I would have a date for my consultation by now. I have found out that I have only just been put on the NHS waiting list, I thought I was put on it 2 months ago!! Oh well, IVF in June is out of the question. I just hope that I have it by the end of summer, that is my new goal. It keeps being pushed back all the time.