I have been exhausted and had a sore throat all day. I think I have a bug coming which is annoying as I now have 3 days off and I will most prob spend them sleeping off a bug :(
I was planning for a bit of BD tonight just for the fun of it as it has been a while as AF lingered longer than expected. Not sure if I have the energy now! Also don't really wanna give DH the bug either!
I really want this cycle to get going. I had to POAS this morn with my clear blue fertility monitor which I thought was a bit early as is cd9 and and I normally ovulate on cd18. I am worried as I only have 10 sticks and don't really want to buy another pack as they cost £20 and then I would be giving up on this cycle already. I will not buy any more unless I really have to.
Showing posts with label fertility monitor. Show all posts
Showing posts with label fertility monitor. Show all posts
Thursday, 26 February 2009
Wednesday, 18 February 2009
Had a cry
Had another shit day at work. I am exhausted and on duty again tonight. My stomach cramps have been bad all day. I have felt sick and had a migraine. I have also been told I look terrible. I looked in the mirror and they were right, I was a horrible grey colour! I have decided I wont go into work tomorrow if I feel this ill. Today was such a struggle.
I have been sitting here catching up on all the blogs I haven't read for a while and watching a bit of TV. I received a mail from a baby website today and it was all about coping with not conceiving. It was as if they knew I had just got a BFN. That was enough for me to burst into tears. Thankfully DH is not at home to witness that small out burst but I do feel better for it.
Was very sad to turn my fertility monitor on this morning and set it to day 1. I know it is a new cycle, new chance to get pregnant but it is still hard to deal with. Having to go through the highs and lows, the hope and misery of TTC and getting another BFN at the end of it all.
I am not in a good place right now. My really bad AF is not helping and the increasing number of pregnancy announcements is making me worse. I know I will feel better once AF is gone but right now I am not great.
Extra note: I have decided new cycle new look to blog, shall do this every cycle. Lets hope I can find enough designs to keep me going!! Who knows how long this may take!
I have been sitting here catching up on all the blogs I haven't read for a while and watching a bit of TV. I received a mail from a baby website today and it was all about coping with not conceiving. It was as if they knew I had just got a BFN. That was enough for me to burst into tears. Thankfully DH is not at home to witness that small out burst but I do feel better for it.
Was very sad to turn my fertility monitor on this morning and set it to day 1. I know it is a new cycle, new chance to get pregnant but it is still hard to deal with. Having to go through the highs and lows, the hope and misery of TTC and getting another BFN at the end of it all.
I am not in a good place right now. My really bad AF is not helping and the increasing number of pregnancy announcements is making me worse. I know I will feel better once AF is gone but right now I am not great.
Extra note: I have decided new cycle new look to blog, shall do this every cycle. Lets hope I can find enough designs to keep me going!! Who knows how long this may take!
Monday, 26 January 2009
AF over
Finally AF is over, it was a very long period this month, 7 days, I only normally bleed for a max of 5 days. Thankfully though I haven't been as unwell as I normally am this period so that was a relief.
I am using my fertility monitor this month again as I found it helped, not because it got me pregnant, because it didnt, it did however show me that I did ovulate and when it happened. I was quite worried that I wouldnt ovulate so that was good. It also told me when to have sex. I just think despite my best efforts we did not have enough sex. The good think about my fertility monitor is that it starts to learn my cycles. I ovulate on day 18 normaly so at the moment being on day 7 it hasn't asked me to POAS yet which is good as I find it awkward to hide it from my DH.
It is our 8 year anniversary of being together tomorrow. I sadly havent got my DH the gift I planned which was me being pregnant. Oh well, will have to aim for our 1 year wedding anniversary in May for that present now. That is what I have decided. I want to be pregnant by May. I feel that is quite a realistic target. Means we would have been properly, actively TTC for just over 6 months. Fingers crossed!!
I am using my fertility monitor this month again as I found it helped, not because it got me pregnant, because it didnt, it did however show me that I did ovulate and when it happened. I was quite worried that I wouldnt ovulate so that was good. It also told me when to have sex. I just think despite my best efforts we did not have enough sex. The good think about my fertility monitor is that it starts to learn my cycles. I ovulate on day 18 normaly so at the moment being on day 7 it hasn't asked me to POAS yet which is good as I find it awkward to hide it from my DH.
It is our 8 year anniversary of being together tomorrow. I sadly havent got my DH the gift I planned which was me being pregnant. Oh well, will have to aim for our 1 year wedding anniversary in May for that present now. That is what I have decided. I want to be pregnant by May. I feel that is quite a realistic target. Means we would have been properly, actively TTC for just over 6 months. Fingers crossed!!
Friday, 9 January 2009
2 agonising weeks
Now that I have ovulated it is all over for the month. I have two long weeks to go to find out whether I am pregnant. I had to use all of my fertility monitor sticks this cycle so will need more for next cycle but don't know whether to buy them or not. If I do buy them then it will be a waste of money if I am pregnant, but if I don't buy them then I am assuming/hoping/wishing I am pregnant!! I guess best thing is to wait and see. I don't have to start testing for fertility until at least day 6 so even if I get a BFN I have time to buy some.
Throughout this cycle so far I have not had any egg white CM, it has been quite watery during my fertile days but that is it. I am pleased I bought my fertility monitor as I would def not know when I had ovulated. I had a bleed last month on day 15 which I presumed to be due to ovulation but who knows. This month there was no bleed so I guess I am not going to be exactly the same every month. I sadly cant go on stomach cramps to tell me when I have ovulated as I have stomach cramps all month due to my endometriosis.
I am dreading getting a BFN for all the obvious reasons but also I don't want another period. Since coming off the pill they have been so painful and hard to get through. sadly my DH has been through so many of my periods he seems to be immune to my pain and how unwell I feel. This does not mean he doesn't care, of course he does, he just thinks its normal for me to feel shit for 5 days. It is normal of course, but its hard get him to understand I feel even more shit and don't want to get out of the bed for 3 days.
As you can tell I am not very good at waiting but I get the impression no one is when they are TTC, I guess we all want this so badly.
Throughout this cycle so far I have not had any egg white CM, it has been quite watery during my fertile days but that is it. I am pleased I bought my fertility monitor as I would def not know when I had ovulated. I had a bleed last month on day 15 which I presumed to be due to ovulation but who knows. This month there was no bleed so I guess I am not going to be exactly the same every month. I sadly cant go on stomach cramps to tell me when I have ovulated as I have stomach cramps all month due to my endometriosis.
I am dreading getting a BFN for all the obvious reasons but also I don't want another period. Since coming off the pill they have been so painful and hard to get through. sadly my DH has been through so many of my periods he seems to be immune to my pain and how unwell I feel. This does not mean he doesn't care, of course he does, he just thinks its normal for me to feel shit for 5 days. It is normal of course, but its hard get him to understand I feel even more shit and don't want to get out of the bed for 3 days.
As you can tell I am not very good at waiting but I get the impression no one is when they are TTC, I guess we all want this so badly.
Saturday, 3 January 2009
Tormenting myself
Was around the in-laws this eve, usually go around every other sat night which is fine I get on well with them. My sister in-law was there tonight with Baby B and he was in a great mood, was quite vocal and interactive with me tonight which was great. Problem is, I cant keep my eyes off him and I dont realise that I am constantly watching him. I am tormenting myself, all I want is to have a baby of my own. I rember when my sister in-law announced she was pregnant, I was extremely happy for her and emotional but I was also extremely jealous. She told everyone her news at her mum's 50th birthday party and I remember thinking and wishing it was me with that great news and I know my DH felt that way aswell. I hope my time will come.
On a different note, my fertility monitor still says low but I feel like I should be getting into my fertile window. My CM is watery, not quite egg white but it doesnt always get like that and I feel more horny. Also I am on day 13 and have a 30 day cycle so not long now, hopefully. We shall see what my morning pee brings!! We had sex this morning anyway, just because I felt like it and it is rare for me to want morning sex, another reason why I think my fertile window should be nearing.
On a different note, my fertility monitor still says low but I feel like I should be getting into my fertile window. My CM is watery, not quite egg white but it doesnt always get like that and I feel more horny. Also I am on day 13 and have a 30 day cycle so not long now, hopefully. We shall see what my morning pee brings!! We had sex this morning anyway, just because I felt like it and it is rare for me to want morning sex, another reason why I think my fertile window should be nearing.
Monday, 29 December 2008
Need to lose weight
My new years resolution is to lose weight, about half a stone for now. I have put this on since my wedding 7 months ago. I gave up smoking 2 months ago and a lot of the weight has gone on because of that but also because I have been far too relaxed about what I eat and definitely not exercising enough. I walk the dog twice a day and am always on my feet with my job but I really don't look after myself properly as far as eating proper food and at the correct times. I can easily skip breakfast and lunch and snack all day and then have a big dinner. Not good for my metabolism or weight. Must eat properly and go to the gym. I don't want to be a fat pregnant person!
I have been using my fertility monitor and have started peeing on the stick to tell me whether I have low, high or peak fertility. So far on day 7 and fertility is low which is no surprise. The only problem is it takes 5 Min's for the test to be run. I am finding it hard to hide it from the husband, I have to pretend I am on the toilet whilst it is running! I know I shouldn't hide it from him and he will be angry, hurt and upset if and when he finds out but I couldn't cope with him calling me obsessive anymore than he already does!
I have been using my fertility monitor and have started peeing on the stick to tell me whether I have low, high or peak fertility. So far on day 7 and fertility is low which is no surprise. The only problem is it takes 5 Min's for the test to be run. I am finding it hard to hide it from the husband, I have to pretend I am on the toilet whilst it is running! I know I shouldn't hide it from him and he will be angry, hurt and upset if and when he finds out but I couldn't cope with him calling me obsessive anymore than he already does!
Tuesday, 23 December 2008
Feel terrible
Have awful cramps, feel sick, can hardly move. My period is a bad one.
On a good not used my fertility monitor for the first time!!
On a good not used my fertility monitor for the first time!!
Sunday, 14 December 2008
Morning sex
We had sex this morning, I think that it is too late as I think I ovulated last weekend as I had some spotting for a day but you never know. I have only just come off the pill so i am not regular at the moment and I don't know my cycle length so I can not be sure when I ovulate. Think Im just clutching at straws though. Cant wait to get my period if I am not pregnant this month so I can start using my fertility monitor as the first day of your period is day 1 and it has to start from there. Unsure however how I am going to be able to test my urine every morning without my husband noticing!!
Saturday, 13 December 2008
The beginning
I have Endometriosis and I am 24 years old. My doctor has told me I should start trying for a baby and that is what I am doing. I have been with my Husband for 8 years, we have been married for 7 months and I feel we are definitely ready.
My periods have always been extremely heavy and painful and I am usually quiet unwell, but the pill has managed to control some of the signs and I had a laser laparoscopy 4 years ago. Coming off the pill was hard, my first period was terrible, I was in bed for 2 days, I could hardly move, felt sick and was in so much pain. I told my husband I couldn't cope with this every month and we needed to start trying a.s.a.p. He told me not to be so obsessive and to be relaxed about it all. I understand the more you stress the less likely it is to happen, but I can not cope with the pain.
This month we have had sex 3times so far, but he has seen very reluctant and nervous about the possibility of me becoming pregnant. We had sex 2 days prior to me ovulating and I was hoping the timing was correct and that I could be pregnant. that was just over a week ago and I feel no different, I don't feel pregnant. I know it takes time, but I cant stand the wait so i took a pregnancy test yesterday morning. It was negative which didn't surprise me, I knew it would be but I just needed it to confirm it. I know its early and I have to wait until I have missed my period but that is another 7 days away which seems like a life time.
The problem is, I am obsessing, having a baby is all I think about and dream about. I want a baby so badly and I know because I want it so badly it wont happen, and that's what I am scared about. If it doesn't happen I will need another operation and I don't know if I can cope with that again.
I have bought a fertility monitor for next month but my husband doesn't know as he would tell me off. I am going to do it properly and get the timing right. Also I am not going to let him be so relaxed and hopefully have sex more. Surely a man should have a higher sex drive than this and more sex is what every man dreams of?!
He as the theory that if it happens it happens but I want it right NOW!
My periods have always been extremely heavy and painful and I am usually quiet unwell, but the pill has managed to control some of the signs and I had a laser laparoscopy 4 years ago. Coming off the pill was hard, my first period was terrible, I was in bed for 2 days, I could hardly move, felt sick and was in so much pain. I told my husband I couldn't cope with this every month and we needed to start trying a.s.a.p. He told me not to be so obsessive and to be relaxed about it all. I understand the more you stress the less likely it is to happen, but I can not cope with the pain.
This month we have had sex 3times so far, but he has seen very reluctant and nervous about the possibility of me becoming pregnant. We had sex 2 days prior to me ovulating and I was hoping the timing was correct and that I could be pregnant. that was just over a week ago and I feel no different, I don't feel pregnant. I know it takes time, but I cant stand the wait so i took a pregnancy test yesterday morning. It was negative which didn't surprise me, I knew it would be but I just needed it to confirm it. I know its early and I have to wait until I have missed my period but that is another 7 days away which seems like a life time.
The problem is, I am obsessing, having a baby is all I think about and dream about. I want a baby so badly and I know because I want it so badly it wont happen, and that's what I am scared about. If it doesn't happen I will need another operation and I don't know if I can cope with that again.
I have bought a fertility monitor for next month but my husband doesn't know as he would tell me off. I am going to do it properly and get the timing right. Also I am not going to let him be so relaxed and hopefully have sex more. Surely a man should have a higher sex drive than this and more sex is what every man dreams of?!
He as the theory that if it happens it happens but I want it right NOW!
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