Spent the morning doing housework and walking my dog. This afternoon I have been catching up on some TV, watching House and reading blogs. To top it all off, my lovely dog has been snuggled up on the sofa with me sleeping, making me feel loved! Obviously the sofa is warm and I am comfy to lay on but I like to think its love, makes me happy that way!!
Reading every ones blogs gives me mixed emotions; joy, sadness, sympathy and hope to name a few. It is nice to read every ones journeys but it makes me wonder where my one is going? Will I get pg soon or will I be going for IVF?
Had a brief conversation with my DH this eve and I asked him why we weren't talking about the elephant in the room and he didn't get what I meant! We are not really talking about us TTC at the mo. When I got AF this time I was obviously distraught but he did not even register it as me not being pregnant. He obviously knew it meant I wasn't pregnant but he didn't say anything to me. Maybe this was because I had a break down last time an he didn't want it to happen again, or I am not sure why. He also said to me that I shouldn't worry as this is only the second month of trying! Has he not been awake or aware for the last 5 months?!?! I am getting a little frustrated at the moment as he does not appear to be worried that I am not pregnant yet and doesn't seem to care at the moment. Maybe I am wrong. He does seem to keep a lot bottled up and doesn't tell me what he is thinking about as he doesn't want me to worry. A little input from him would be nice sometimes.
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Hi nic, it's good you had a relaxing day. I do understand you still feeling down though. For me some of the worst time of ttc was the first few months to the 1yr mark. I was so depressed. It felt like I was failing also.
ReplyDeleteI still have some sad days, but I was so "relieved" when I finally found out what path dh & I would need to take to get preg. Now it helps because I feel like I'm actully headed some where and now I'm on my way to my bfp. I feel that it's only a matter of time now.
I hope that your dh learns to open up and talk to you a little more:) I know it'll help with some of the sadness when he does. And hopefully very soon you'll find out if you will need to do IUI or IVF to get preg. The sooner that happens the better in my opinion:)
That way you know what your dealing with. Hope you continue to have good days!!
(HUGS),
Hannah
Nic- it's a boy thing, they have no concept of time. I understand the frustration of not getting pregnant right off and it's a horrible feeling..
ReplyDeleteMy husband didn't really seem to get it until we started spending money on treatments. He said that he never wanted to bring it up before that because all he knew was if we talked about it that I got sad. I think guys have a hard time sharing in general, and then when it comes to IF it is even harder for them. I wish you guys luck.
ReplyDeleteHere from ICLW. DH and I didn't really talk about it. We didn't talk about the m/c either. We finally started talking about it when we went to the RE and he had to drop off a sample.
ReplyDeleteIt was hard, it felt like he was ignoring a problem that was obvious to me.
All the best for you and DH.
it is so frustrating, i know where you are coming from, BELIEVE me, but since your only a few months in there's still hope that you could be one of the lucky ones! maybe you will be pregnant in the next couple of months! good luck!
ReplyDeleteiclw
Sometimes it takes a little while for them to get it. :) Hang in there with him. Glad you're having a snuggly day with the dog!
ReplyDeleteI think that knowing what path is needed to get pregnant gives a lot of comfort. It's like, "I have no control over my body, but this is the path that the doctor recommends and has worked for so many others..." and just knowing that helps.
ReplyDeleteICLW
This is the reason that I gave my DH my blog address. He needed to be able to read what was in my mind as I am not very good at verlizing my feelings. It has definitely helped with him knowing where I am and what I'm thinking.
ReplyDeleteThe only bad side to it is that it makes venting about him a bit harder to do. lol